SPAMMED! How Twitter got me and how Facebook should clean up their act!

   

    One of my friends sent me a DM on Twitter asking if I had seen a picture of myself and ended with "LOL".  I got a little nervous because I had recently performed a song at her Mother's 60th Birthday Party, and I am known to have some pretty crazy facial expressions when I sing. Anyway, when I clicked on the link, Twitter immediately sent me to a page saying that it did not exist. I didn't understand, and right as I was about to call my friend to ask her about the picture, another friend DM'd me saying "Hey Love, change your password you Spammed me!"

    Spam? I was confused. Doesn't that only happen in the Email world? I checked my DM list and saw that about 20 of my followers had sent the same exact message that my friend originally sent me! I also got a ton of messages that I had sent spam (the same message) to other people!!! I immediately changed my password to Twitter.

   That happening to me, made me realize that SPAM is everywhere- not just in a can.  If Twitter can be spammed, then I really would need to monitor my account, to make sure my "tweets" are NEVER compromised!

    Although I had never had this specific issue with Facebook, I feel "spammed" when Facebook allowed users to send invites to parties and requests to play Farm Games.  I have so many requests for events and parties, that I rarely check that feature anymore and put out a disclaimer to my friends that if they wanted to invite me to anything, use another source.  It is overwhelming, and I am hoping that Facebook will come up with a way to fix this issue as I have heard so many of my peers complain about the same thing.  It is the reason that so many people migrated over to Twitter in the first place.  Seems that Facebook's IPO isn't their only problem ;-)

          

GREAT TEACHER'S MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

     I will never forget the moment in the 8^th grade, when my teacher cursed me out. Her name was Mrs. Jersky, and was known as one of the hardest teachers in my middle school. Of course, because of her reputation, many students opted to leave the “s” in her last name out, and although I wouldn't say she was a “jerk”, she was surely nothing to be played with. The day she “cursed me out”, she never used one profane word--- English teachers do not need to use profanity- they can curse you out courtesy of Webster.

     Anyway, she pulled me outside of the classroom, and told me how disappointed she was in me for falling behind on assignments. She told me that I was one of her brightest students and my actions were unacceptable. She didn't even ask me if I wanted to have another chance to make up for not doing my work, she just simply told me I had better turn in every assignment I missed by the next day or it was my Gluteus Maximus...she made me feel like I was the jerk that day...but believe I turned in all of those assignments the VERY next day.

 

As I approach my final semester before graduating, I reflect upon teachers that made a difference in my life. There have been a few that have done NOTHING for my growth as a human being or scholar, there have been some that have been “hard” without a rhyme or reason, and there have been some that do the bare minimum and you can tell they would rather be somewhere else.

    In a time where the education system and teachers are often criticized, many people forget to thank the ones who ARE doing their jobs, doing them well, and actually care about their students. You don't have to teach a student, to have an impact on their lives- just having integrity and being fair is the start; but there are some of you out here that REALLY care about promoting your students to the next level- even if it means being a “Jerk” and kicking some glutes! So to you all, I say “Thank You” now for impacting my life and pushing me to be the best scholar and PERSON I can be...I can only pray that my children have educators like you in the future.

Peace & Blessings,

   Patrice (Jones) Nickols

DEDICATED TO:

Mrs. Wrenn, Mrs. Jersky, Dr. Carter, Dr. Faux, Professor Caldwell, Dr. Conrad, Professor McNeal, Ms. Davis, Mr. Rose, Mrs. Aarons, Mrs. Nobles- Jones, Mr. Summers..and to any teacher I forgot, forgive my head and not my heart!

LOVE IS IN THE AIR...AND ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!! Why you should limit your love life exposure on Social Media....

     Happy Valentine's Day to EVERYONE! Although this day is observed as the day that those who are in-love are to show this to one another, for me, I believe this is a day that love should be shown to EVERYONE- romantic or not...as some of my friends put it, this is “Single Awareness Day” LOL...and to them, I say “I love you!”

          

    I have noticed something a bit disturbing, and this happens on the other 364 days of the year to-- people exposing TOO much about their personal/ love lives on social media. I have seen the romantic overload, where some people's posts on Facebook and Twitter are ALWAYS talking about love (having it or wanting it); I have seen others profiles flooded with sexual content every five minutes, and I have seen those who probably started the name “Single Awareness Day” because their posts are so depressing and TOO forthcoming about their lack of a love life, or how their former flame did them SOOO wrong!

    

    Using Twitter and Facebook to express yourself is definitely one of the perks of utilizing social media; however, too much of something is NEVER a good thing- and that includes your love life. When you expose so much of your life, it gives off a perception- one you may not be aware of in some cases. For those that MUST post a daily picture of themselves kissing their spouse can give off a perception that they're more interested in “trying to show the world” that they're in love, but may not “really be” and that they in turn are “FAKE” [insert MANY celebrity breakup examples here]. For those with the sexual hunger of an animal, no judgments here, but your profile should never read that you cannot go five minutes without talking/thinking about sex---unless you work in another type of industry...that rhymes with “corn”; lastly, those that are dealing with that “Scandal”-esque love (devastating, world changing, painful love) learn to limit how much of that you post...it reads “I am depressed!” and while that may not be true, as my Dad used to tell me, “Sometimes the truth will be other people's perceptions and there's nothing you can do about it”.

 

    I would like to believe many people are well-rounded, and have lives that are made up of many different experiences; make sure your profiles reflect this and try to keep some things about your life private...you never know who is watching!

 

 

HARD CONVERSATIONS

HARD CONVERSATIONS

      It seems that this past weekend, all of the hard conversations I needed to have occured! What's funny is that I was more prepared than I thought I was to have these conversations.  In order to manage my CRAZY life, I have to write everything down...and I do- including notes to remember and talking points for upcoming things :-) Knowing that I was going to have these conversations eventually, I made sure that I applied this, as well as other things, because as I grow, I understand that EFFECTIVE conversations have many elements- not just getting out what YOU want to say.  When you know you are about to have a "hard" conversation, prepared or not, remember these things:


1. WRITE IT DOWN

     Like I said, I write things down. I hate the feeling of forgetting to mention something I REALLY wanted to mention lol! I also use this type of writing as a rough draft. When I write it, it becomes real on paper, and I may realize that it is not such a great point OR it may come off wrong.  For those of you that have trouble communicating, or don't know HOW to say things sometimes {insert me here} , try it and see how it works!


2. STAY CALM

    I am not always the one to stay calm when I communicate- I get excited! But I am learning when I really stay calm (and wooosah) while I speak or while the other person speaks, I am received and respected much more.  Also, staying calm in a heated conversation helps you because in the end if the other person is acting a fool, you will walk away looking like the sane one lol.


3.  LISTEN MORE THAN YOU TALK
   
   I am sure everyone has heard this saying before, and quite frankly, it is soooo hard for me, but it is definitely truth! Whether you're wrong or right in a situation, listening to the other person and staying calm does many things in the long run. First, it helps you to understand the other person's point of view more, which gives you a better chance in solving the problem in the end. It also gives you more of a chance to THINK before speaking!!!!


4. UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN EMOTIONS AND FACTS

    When a problem festers, we use our EMOTIONS and FEELINGS to define the TRUTH and FACTS.  When you are dealing with other people, they often do the same. This means when you come into a conversation, you are already coming into it with TWO different perspectives of the TRUTH.  With this said, make sure that you decipher between feelings and truth.  It is ok to "feel", but know the truth of the situation. 

     When expressing how you feel, say "When you did ____, it made me feel _______" ; instead of "You did _______ and that made ______ happen!"  The person that offended you may not have ever intended for the latter to happen, or may not be AWARE.  Know the difference and deal from there!



5.  KNOW THAT SOME CONVERSATIONS WON'T END AS A FAIRYTALE

     At the end of the day, some conversations require a two-part finale. Sometimes, there is no immediately resolve and it takes years! While most of us would love to walk away with an understanding or at least the feeling of being understood, life does not always happen this way.  The way to live well with or without the resolve, is to be confident in how YOU handled the conversation.  You must always live with the notion that if YOU did your best in communicating, let God do the REST!

Supporting Black-owned Businesses

                             

MADAME CJ WALKER

                                                        1867- 1919

Inventor, businesswoman, Philanthropist, and Social Activist

  So in lieu of Black History Month, I figured I would bring up the topic of black-owned businesses and the oh-so common assertion that Black folks, don't support their own. There are many different theories on why this happens, and we have heard from every public African-American figure about the importance of supporting black-owned businesses, yet the mystery remains unsolved.

    As a business marketing student, but also a consumer, I often try to look at business from both standpoints- anyone who has the slightest interest in business SHOULD understand that an important factor in business is first understanding consumer wants and needs. Anyway, what I have found, is that whether you are black, white, or green, consumers want products, but they also want GREAT CUSTOMER SERVICE.

    Customer service is not saying “Hi” when a customer enters the establishment, then going back to Tweeting about how much you hate your job; Customer service involves engagement, care, and mind-reading! Yes, I said mind-reading! Whether you are the business owner or salesclerk, a good business trains employees to look at certain things to assess a customer's needs and wants. For instance, when I am walking slow and tell the salesclerk I am just browsing, I want them to greet me, tell me the sales specials, and leave me alone! BUT, when I come in walking fast and flustered the day before my wedding looking for a basket for the flower girl, GIVE ME ANSWERS NOW! (I am still salty about that experience as you can see lol) Overall, just act like you care about what I need, and if you don't have it, help me to get it! That will ALWAYS make a customer come back. Word-of- mouth goes a LONG way also, so make sure what I say about you is GREAT! Take PRIDE in your work- it is your business card when you are not there!

   On the flip-side, I know what it is like to be the one providing the service and some of my folks are NEVER satisfied- almost like they come in looking for a problem. There are some people that you can never satisfy, and you have to let that roll off of your back. For those that scream “Black businesses don't give good customer service!”, look at yourself and how you may be treating the people that work for these businesses. If you can wait two quarters for Beyonce to come out for the Superbowl, you can wait a few extra minutes for a salesperson who is trying their best, but is extremely busy trying to satisfy five other customers at once. Chill lol... And the MONEY ISSUE- quit with the hook-up mentality!!!!! If you can pay hundreds and thousands of dollars to an Asian-owned business, to have a Caucasian-owned shipping company to provide you with a Brazilian girl's hair to sew into your own, you can pay an extra dollar to Supersize!

    I have had GREAT experiences and very poor experiences in black-owned businesses. I have had great and poor experiences in other businesses as well. But I am fair, if the customer service is not “on point”, I speak up to let the establishment know (yea I grew up to be one of those people lol); however, when the customer service is AWESOME, I also speak up, and go as far as sending a letter to the corporate office (yea, I am one of those people too lol). No matter the color of the people running the establishment, I will always acknowledge those who are doing well...but I will admit, as I walk out of the door, I smile a little harder when it is one of my sisters or brothers behind the counter :-)

WHEN BLOGGING GOES RIGHT!

    I have been longing to make more time for my blog, as ideas and thoughts come to me MUCH more often than time allows me to share them...and now I have a major reason! While rounding up my last semester *crosses fingers* at Bowie State University, I am taking a Social Media class that will be a great contribution to my experience and education in marketing. My teacher will look at the posts and grade me on the content and frequency of updates! This also means, that I want YOU (yes, you reading this), to make sure you check me out ---let my teacher know I am doing some things :-)   I am depending on you!

    Next blog post- "Supporting Black-owned businesses"....